farewell year that rhymes with my name

here are my top ten memories of 2008:
10. Yankees vs. A's at Yankee Stadium:
Shauna and I went to NYC for my bday and she took me to a Yankees game. It was awesome. I got to see the stadium again before it gets demolished. However, my fav memory of the day was switching seats 6 times and stressing Shauna out because I wanted us to sit closer and risk being kicked out of the stadium. All in all it worked out....4+ innings close to first base isnt bad!

9. The Wachovia in Charlotte, NC:
Me and my dad got to, for the first time, go to the final day of play and watch the championship come to an end. It was a great moment to see Anthony Kim win that tourney.

8: Golf:
With Shauna working in NC most of the spring, I got a lot of golf in...more than I can remember since college. Granted, her absence sucked worse than anything on the face of the planet, but it did call for great lonely afternoons improving my game.

7: Big XMAS tree:
I love big Christmas trees. At ALC, we had a 25+ft tree and it was awesome. It looked great, too.

6. Memorial Day Weekend:
My family came up over Memorial Day and we went to DC, boated into Baltimore harbor (thanks Dan), and went to a Yankees game. It was a really cool weekend.

5. Driving in NYC:
Ok, I am a dork, but I absolutely love driving in Manhattan. It makes me smile to be a pushy arrogant street pilot and pound my horn for the slightest reason. It makes everyone in the car nervous but I love it. I like to make believe I am a local. I experienced this first when Shauna's parents were in NYC over a weekend and we took a day trip. I loved speeding down 9th avenue weaving through the yellow cabs.

4. Moving to MD:
Probably one of the most difficult and rewarding things Shauna and I have ever done was to accept a position at ALC in MD. Shauna worked from NC and we weren't together very much for 4+ months. It was hard. However, God knew what he was doing with us and it is one of the best decisions we feel we have ever made. We have developed a great start to what we hope to be a deep and lasting relationship with Dan and Kathy and all of ALC.

3. Christmas in NC with Family:
It isnt over yet, but tomorrow we drive back to MD. Over the past week and a half we have had so much fun with our family and hanging out with old friends (not OLD, but friends we have known for a while...well, one or two of them were old...but they dont get online so...). It has been wonderful relaxing and not having an agenda other than to chill out. It is definitely a much needed breather, but we are ready to get back to MD. Shauna is going back for her MA and we are starting some cool new things at ALC.

2. Aaron.
Me and Aaron celebrate our birthdays by going to a concert each year (starting in 2007). We went to see The Police in 2007, and Willie Nelson this past summer. I do not recommend Willie's show. Anywho, after much prayer and time, Aaron and I have the opportunity to work together again. It is definitely something God had his hand on. It is so cool to watch Aaron work in his gift and to see him dream and create vision. God is still working some things out, but this thing has some great potential. Along with Sat evening celebrations starting at ALC soon, 2009 could be one the biggest years in ministry I have had the joy of working in.

1. My wife.
She moved to MD (finally) in June. It is so good to be married to this woman. She makes me laugh and laughs at my jokes (even when they arent that funny). I really can imagine what life without her is like, because while she went back and forth with her work during the spring, I got plenty of alone time without her. I hated it. I am so glad and blessed to have her in my life. Shauna, I love you very much.

So there it is...2008. There were many downers for sure for a lot of people, but it was truly a great year for me and Shauna. We had some challenges, problems, and aggravation, but all in all, it will be one of the most important years of our life. We learned a lot about ourselves and met many challenges we didn't know we had the ability to overcome. I suppose that tonight at midnight, we're supposed to put all that behind us...

Taking risks and watching God define our time and lives never comes to an end, though. And that is probably the top growth experience I had in 2008...it will go with me. Does that make any sense at all? In my world it surely does...

taking risks,
n

here it is...merry christmas

so here i sit backstage minutes before our creative teams show up at ALC as we do our final two xmas eve celebrations. green and blue are good colors for that, right??
after the last celebration, my wife, aaron and i will skip out quickly to an overstuffed car and ride to NC throughout the night. i am excited and a bit worried.

excited because i know tonight will be very awesome here in our church community. worried because as the season has snuck up on me and i have not reflected on the moment as much as i would have liked to do so. emotionally, i would have preferred to take more time to feel and reflect today and the pst few days. lesson learned. the reason for worry is that as i ride down the road, the feelings will catch up with me and i may go into several hours of verbal reflection. i feel sorry for my comrades. but then again, maybe i wont.

it will be very cool to spend time with family and take some time off. i will miss ALC over the holiday, though. i really feel like shauna and i are integrating here pretty well. even on our way back from NC over thanksiving, we recognized the belonging feeling we have here in MD. it has been a very positive, life changing year for us both. not only that, God has proved himself very faithful to us. amidst the challenges, we have seen and experienced the grace and provision of a very caring father.

well what do you know, it seems i am connecting with those feelings already : )

merry christmas everyone,
take the risk and follow what God is leading you towards...you won't regret it.
-n

lessons for a town house maryland christmas and legend of the gimp tree

so, moving to Maryland has been a learning experience, especially when it comes to decorating. today was Christmas decorating day at the drye house (um, townhouse). we brought out the decorations and spent a couple of hours getting everything arranged. below is my top ten list of things to make sure of when you are decorating a townhouse for Christmas. it is just my learned lessons, nothing more...
10. Christmas Movie: you HAVE to have a good movie on. we chose our traditional National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation and took frequent breaks. it snowed today as well, and that helped the Christmas spirit.
9. TIME: we chose a Saturday early afternoon. this seemed to work well with our weekend as we carefully kept our calendar clear for the festive event. i went out in the AM for coffee and a tree, and came back to clean out large Tupperware storage bins full of holiday cheer. we carefully planned a good 4-5 hours for what takes 2- hours tops. we took frequent breaks (ok, maybe it was just me).
8. TREE SELECTION: ok, most people would put this around the top 3 because of the seriousness of the tree, but this year, we were experimenting. it wasn't AS important. see, we ALWAYS get a live tree (ok, we have had 4 Christmases together (double rabbit trail thought 4 Christmases was a great movie and I laughed a lot) so ALWAYS may be a bit strong). for the past 3 years, i have picked out a ridiculously large tree (our house in NC had vaulted ceilings). this year, now that we live in a townhouse on the bay, i was scared to get a large tree because we have 8ft ceilings. so, as you can see, the tree is a good 4-5 ft tall and looks gimpy. lesson learned...7ft tree in the future.
7. VOLUME: a townhouse can handle more than we thought. we went conservative this year because the townhouse is a bit um, how you say, small and tall. we COULD have just looked at what other people do, but i am lazy and figured keeping the volume to a minimum was a good idea this year. plus, we took more breaks.
6. TIMING: this is the first time we have waited until AFTER Nov 28 to decorate, and to tell ya the truth, it seems as though we cheated ourselves out of a couple weeks of holiday enjoyment. i think we need to decorate either right before turkey day or immediately afterward. this is an odd year, though...we spent the week of thanksgiving in NC and away from our new home so decorating was a bit challenging. but it looks cool...
5. FOOD: today for lunch during the decorating i had some leftover chili and a turkey sandwich...a good yule log and some fresh chili with grilled cheese would have really done the trick...and some peanut butter balls...Jesus would have been more proud...don't skimp on the meal is my suggestion
4. PLACEMENT OF THE TREE: ok, now we get into the nitty gritty...we placed the tree RIGHT beside our box of glowing pictures. time will tell whether this is a good move or not. it does make the zombie on the couch look i go for much easier to accomplish. however, we may move the location back to behind the couch in the future...i am unsure...this has top three potential.
3. MAXIMUM STORAGE ACCESSIBILITY: this is a newbie priority for me. make all the decor storage very accessible in the town home. this means prioritizing the placement of boxes in the "cave" on the bottom floor. if you create "crawl ways" (kind of like walkways that you crawl through) and accessibility it makes the process of decorating much simpler. this was a grade A #1 move for us (me) this year.
2. PRIORITIZE LIGHTING: with the gimp tree this year, we made a priority on the best lights. see, with a 13 ft tree, you need lots of lights. with a gimp tree, you only need two strands of your best lights. so, make them count...
and finally,
1. NAPTIME: make it a point to be extra lazy after decorating by turning up the space heater and curling up for a good afternoon nap. after that, watch college football, 80s movies ($20 if you can identify the movie we're watching in the photo above...), reality TV, and Celebrity Rehab with Dr Drew...oh, and get take out chinese. it is the evening the shepherds foretold.

so that's it...for all you townhouse dwellers, i hope this was helpful
-n

behold my demise

so, a coworker who we'll just call KIM...gave me a bag of small round peppers.
BEHOLD


most of them were green at first, then they all turned a bright red. so last night i decided to cut them up, and Shauna used 3 of them in a stir fry.

long story short...i should have used gloves. these are some of the hottest peppers i have eaten...EVER. did i say ever? i think they are habaneros...but the flavor isn't familiar. JUST the presence of these little demons in the stir fry was too much for Shauna. i LOVE hot food, esp peppers, and it took me a while to get through the meal...which i did and loved it.

However, everything i touch now has pepper oil on it and burns...so don't shake my hand for a while...unless you want your skin to burn. i cant wear my contact lenses right now...my eyes felt like they were going to explode this morning when i tried to put in my contacts.

so, thank you Kim...i want more of these peppers...and some gloves. and hopefully, in a few days i can put my contacts in and be normal...until then, dont shake my hand...trust me.

we accept the love we think we deserve...

i look at several blogs every week. one of them is the postsecret blog developed by frank warren. the blog is definitely something to look at with discretion, and i, personally, find it intriguing. basically (short explanation is needed), the blog is nothing but people's volunteered anonymous secrets. it is a wonderful study of our culture.

that being said, i ran across a quote on there this week:
"we accept the love we think we deserve."

i tend to highly agree with this statement. not only do we struggle to forgive and love others, but when it comes to ourselves, it is very difficult. i also think this is a large factor in someone accepting the forgiveness and love of christ. how can we accept this forgiveness and love and it be a natural part of our development?

i would love to hear anyone's thoughts on this. i find it very interesting.
taking risks,
-n

chill out and be normal...

So, I lead teams of creative people at ALC, and honestly, it kind of surprises me. You see, I am, by nature, a very obsessive compulsive type of person. When you combine obsessive compulsiveness with creative personalities, explosions happen. However, I have this affinity for the creative, myself. So, in some ways, the two personalities meet in my strange strange world.

A great example of this is what happens every week at ALC when we merge art, creativity, music, and media production together. For instance, this week, we not only had a good music set, we had eight full videos, an interpretive dance (coordinated with a video), top 20 music in the background before and after, camera production of everything, words on a screen with moving video, and oh yeah, a message (great job btw this week, Dan). With all of this happening, the teams I lead make or break the production. We constantly remind ourselves of how God trusts and enables us to communicate no matter what job individuals on the team perform. But we also consistently pray that God will dominate the conversation every week in our Celebrations.

This week (today, Nov 9) was themed around the emotion/ issue of stress. GREAT. You know what happens when you put 20-30 team members on the production line when we talk about stress?
1. The lead of the music team battles illness (however, Rich did sound like Bob Seger so it was kinda cool)
2. People FORGET that they are on schedule and we are short several team members
3. I stress out
4. We have a major message element (dance), and it is now more stressful in the production because of missing team members and the lovely welcome of winter colds. AND the leader of the dance team gets married two days before so she (for WONDERFUL GREAT REASONS CONGRATS JENN!!!) couldn't be there. (AND YOU DID A GREAT JOB AS THE LEAD THIS WEEK< href="http://abundantlifechurch.us/main/podcasts.html">You can be directed here. It is usually uploaded and ready by Tuesday at the latest.

Take the risk,
n

ThinkTank @ ALC

Every one of our Celebrations at ALC is the product of many team players, thinkers, dreamers, and doers. It is so much fun for our Creative Arts teams to pull off artistic worship elements each week. But these elements don't just "happen", they are brainstormed and developed months before an actual Celebration.

Each element, from a musical selection during the break to an artistic expression during a message, has a specific purpose in the Celebration. Many of our elements are produced by a specific team in Creative Arts called ThinkTank.

ThnkTank is a team we began developing a few months ago. The only reason ThinkTank exists is to brainstorm and dream. The team meets once a month to discuss ideas, dreams, and develop fresh methods of communication for our Celebration. However, the meeting is only valuable if the team members bring ideas to the meeting. To help facilitate this, the ThinkTank blog (www.alcthinktank.blogspot.com) is utilized. Series titles and themes are posted regularly, and the blog is the vehicle ThinkTank uses to generate individual contribution, so when the team gathers, everyone can contribute.

If you are interested in a low commitment and fun way to contribute creatively to our community at ALC, you may want to consider the ThinkTank team. It is a great entry into the larger Creative Arts team that produces the art and influence in our Celebrations.

To get more info, all you need to do is go to the blog (mentioned above) and start sharing your ideas. Once you subscribe to the blog, you will receive info on meetings and everything you will need to contribute.

tell me what i want to hear...

and now for a political bullet point rant for both candidates:

• quit attacking your opponent and tell me WHY to vote for you. it doesn't seem you can do that without including the attack. refute, defend, but stop the pointless character attacks...neither of you will ever live up to our expectations. i am disappointed.
• be normal. quit saying safe statements. be authentic. if you have convictions or frustrations on policy that needs changing, let me know. why must you be so boring when you talk to us, the voters? i am disappointed.
• talk to me. i am undecided. quit talking to your CORE and exciting them. you are using the screams and cheers as false momentum. YOU ALREADY HAVE THOSE VOTES. QUIT TALKING TO THEM AND TALK TO ME. i am disappointed.
• watch CNN. there is this great blog called fact check and it is one of the best blogs i have found. (votegopher.com is also very good) i have found CNN to be non-partisan and more reliable than ANY other newscast (cable or network). once i started reading, i was again disappointed.
• give me facts about our economic issue. go back to our moves in the late nineties, for example, and how the administration in that time demanded companies like Fannie and Freddie were mandated to create a playground for bad credit practices. tell me how we plan on restoring and rejuvenating our false economy of the past six years. i am SO disappointed.
• give us more ammunition for SNL. someone mess up! says something coarse or ridiculous! will someone please be the entertainment besides sarah palin? she is the only GEM for comedy in this gaggle (credit: drew wade word). i am...you know
• how come you continue to ignore people under 30? last election, 47% of us voted. i GUARANTEE you more will vote this time. speak to us. speak to those coming after us. help us out. we are getting screwed when it comes to the long term health of our government, and neither of you care to address that. we may not be the millionaries and fund raisers yet, but oh my good lord what loyalty we would provide when really drive the economy in ten years. thanks MTV for beginning this conversation in the 80's. maybe facebook will tackle this in the next four years in a more effective way. disappointed.
• back up your talk from the rick warren forum. both of you expressed Christian values and faith, but the way you BOTH run your campaigns say differently. it just resembles what i hvae feared...you are only saying what people want to hear. not only that, your actions are only portraying what your campaign wants people to see. you are not actors. cut it out. estoy decepcionado

the common thread here: disappointment. i have no idea where the leadership is for this election because we cant see it. it seems like too many smoke and mirrors. we will not know until later, and this type of trial and error seems to be breaking our bones. in these weak web we put our trust?

Job 8:13-15 (New International Version)

13 Such is the destiny of all who forget God;
so perishes the hope of the godless.

14 What he trusts in is fragile ^[a] ;
what he relies on is a spider's web.

15 He leans on his web, but it gives way;
he clings to it, but it does not hold.

OH...help.

take the risk,
n

DOW, why you be so mean?

Firstly, the book Jesus For President, has had a profound effect on me the past few weeks. I heartily endorse and recommend you read it. Many, many kudos to shane claiborne and chris haw. My thoughts below are taken from some musings since reading the book, a conversation with my dad, and mostly just my journey through some of this economic mess.

The past few weeks have really stressed out the American public. And, rightfully so. I was talking to my dad on the phone earlier this week about the stock market and the losses and bailout ad nauseam. My dad and I are very similar: we look similar, we have some of the same spending habits, when either of us are stressed out it is obvious (we don’t hide our feelings very well). And in this conversation, I was the only one stressed out. We talked about the economy could cripple the job market, how he and I could lose our jobs if the spiral downward kept going. We talked about how his retirement and investments are losing money every day, and how my retirement in its infancy should be ok in the long run. And throughout this entire conversation, he would say things like: “yep, it’s gonna be tough,” “well, whatcha gonna do...” And I finally said to him: “Dad, I am watching CNN and the DOW Jones like a maniac and getting depressed...and I don;t have as much in this to lose as you do or the majority of investors. Why do you seem to not care about this?” And my dad said these brilliant words of wisdom: “Well, what happens happens. You need to stop watching this stuff. Don’t get depressed, it isn’t good for you.”
I have meditated and thought about those simple, non threatening words from my dad. These are certainly different words than I receive from CNN and drudgereport.com. Why is my dad, who I am very much a carbon copy of, not stressed out? And it hit me, my dad is not living his life around these economic successes or failures. He isn’t depending on a presidential candidate to fix everything. He knows that none of that will probably happen...because what happens will happen. Now, my dad is not some super spiritual giant who makes blasé statements like “God is in control.” But you know what, whether he says it often in cliche or not, I know my dad has a hope in Christ. And in the midst of all this stress, my own walk with Jesus seems to be challenged. I am responding differently than him on many of these issues.

We are 30/31 days away from electing a new president. I am into the debates and the whole thing. I read blogs, watch jibjab.com, youtube videos...I love it. I have watched our culture base our existence and hope of survival on these two candidates. Let me tell you: no political party has that power. Too many people in our culture live with these candidates as hope...one article I read even called a candidate the Hope of the World. Friends, when we live like this, we are in real danger.

Living with Jesus as Lord in our lives has nothing to do with that type of thinking. This week, I have been challenged a great deal by this little phrase: Jesus is my Lord. For this to be reality for most of my week, Jesus would be the focus of my thoughts and actions instead of CNN, blogs, calendars, facebook, and the DOW Jones. All these things are not bad, they are actually quite helpful at times. But I tend to catch myself, in my journey, looking at other influences to drive my time, energy, mood, and general outlook on life. See, with Jesus as Lord, all these things (facebook, CNN, blogs, etc.) are put under a different filter and lens, and my outlook becomes more like a “what happens happens.” I am not apathetic, I am balanced and hopeful because I live with Jesus as Lord.

take the risk,
n

Jesus is my friend...thanks, chris

for those of you that read this via facebook, go to this site and watch this video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-NOZU2iPA8

eveyrone else, enjoy!
big thank you to chris shelrton for bringing this my attention.

A Healthy Dose of Doubt

This past weekend, we began a series centered around the Apostles' Creed. I tis firstly important that before anyone begins pointing a decrepit judging finger at us, that a good interpretation of the Creed needs to be researched (i.e. concerning Jesus descending to Hell, the holy catholic church, etc.). We are basically looking at the ancient creed and trying to parallel how this effects our cultural interpretation and experience.

With that framework, I have a thought to share:
I don’t know about you, but when I read certain stories from the bible, I take a step back and sigh. I have developed a habit of questioning and diving into the text. For instance, there is a great story in the New Testament where Peter (one of the guys Jesus personally coached) was encouraged by jesus to come out and walk on water with him. Immediately, my mind goes to what that picture looked like: two poor Jewish men walking on water in this fierce storm. The story reads that Peter sank and Jesus saved him. Jesus asked Peter the question: WHY did you doubt?

At this point, I wonder why Jesus asked that question. I think it obvious why Peter doubted: look at the scene being created here. I think it is cool that Peter didn’t die because of his doubt; he actually was free to doubt. Jesus didn’t yell at him. it wasn’t like Peter caused Jesus any grief with his doubt. In retrospect, the doubting caused Peter to have greater belief: Jesus saved him in the middle of his doubt.

I think about how many doubts I have had. I know this: Jesus is not intimidated or depressed because of my doubt. On the contrary, he is actually working to help save me in the midst of the doubt that I have. My prayer for us in this Credo series is simple: that we would experience the Kingdom of God fully in our community, and that Christ’s salvation would be the dominating factor that actually makes us stronger, and free to doubt. In our doubting, I pray that our belief would actually grow. I think Peter would agree.

If you would like to follow along with the conversation we are having, download the podcasts (video or audio) each week from our site (usually uploaded by tues or wed) and read the devo, A Place for Skeptics by Mitchell and Larson. We are using this devo as a tool in the conversation. If you are going to seriously read the book, contact me and I will get one to you at a discounted price.

Take the risk,
-n

oh God...WOW this kid!

ok, so Kathy (pastor on staff here) sent me this email with a link to a "baby preacher." it is truly on of the funniest things i have viewed in some time. it is reality TV for the ol' holy roller culture that I experienced growing up, and many people (esp in the South) can relate to...

here it is. turn up the volume and enjoy. i would hate to be this little kid's therapist in 10-15 years.

interesting conversation...

so my buddy jared responded to my last post with a very interesting, yet to me, a very provoking statement. i decided rather to respond just to him, which i will still do, i wanted to post this conversation. so, here it is:

Jared said...

Im with you up to the point when someone asks " who are you voting for?" Unless you and Rob Bell are so aggressively non-partisan that you do not vote... Which I find no fault in, but many patriots in the great city of Baltimore do...

nate said...

no i will vote. i am unsure what rob bell will do. and i do think it is a great injustice to our culture for every vote not cast. i agreee with the baltimore patriots :)

however, my voting preference doesnt need to be public. it is mine. and i dont want to influence others by my voting decision or preference. rather, i think they should be influenced by what facts are out there.

the tragedy here is, this whole thing is so dysfunctional. we christ followers have a reputation (whether we like it or not) of creating a good versus evil outlook on candidates. i refuse to be a part of that. furthermore, i will withhold my personal preference and voting part/stance to avoid being a part of that reputation, and influence. the more important thing is to remember that no candidate is the salvation of the world. imagine if all the moral laws and codes and christian priorities were in office and passed into law. would our nation be saved? would the kingdom of God reign? would divorce go down? would abortion and the causes for abortion be remedied? would AIDS disappear? would war cease?

no candidate is the hope of the world. it is time the church and christ followers in the extreme right winged parts of our culture mature and realize that.

so, any other thoughts? this is quite fun.

take the risk,

-nate

thanks Tim...

so, i saw this on tim stevens' blog, and i want to pose the same questions. watch the ad and then continue reading:


so, if i may steal some of tim's question and add a few of my own:
*Is this how a pastor should leverage his/her influence?
*How about any person of influence?
*How is it helpful for a spiritual leader to tell his/her church who he/she is voting for?
*Why do pastors and spiritual leaders feel compelled to do stuff like this?

with that said, i am not making an endorsement on my blog. i agree with what tim and several other leaders that i respect have to say: that my political bent as a pastor/leader/influencer should not build a wall between me and anyone around me. i don't do signs or bumper stickers because i eel i will instantly create a barrier in communication with many. i also believe that this in no way compromises who i am in christ. the fact that i am (as rob bell talks about) an aggressive non-partisan actually gives me better influence and leverage in my community to build communication and relationship. furthermore, i love what authors and leaders like claiborne and haw have to say in their book, JESUS FOR PRESIDENT: American and her laws and politics are not the hope of the world. That (hope) is best left to Jesus and his church.

Thoughts?

Light Show (revisited)

Light Show

I love concerts. I especially enjoy the light shows at concerts. The music of the 1980s really paved the way for light show artists: moving lights, strobe lights, blinding lights over the audience, etc. So when the writers in the Bible (particularly the New Testament) talk about our lives being light in culture (see Ephesians 5, John 3, I Corinthians 4, and I John 2, in particular), I light up (pardon the pun) with interest.

What kind of light am I? If I am looked at like a light at a great concert, what light am I providing? Moving and entertaining light, confusing strobe light, strong flood lights, or maybe industrial and boring fluorescent lights? One of the writers in scripture, Paul, actually made this statement: “It is even possible for light to turn the thing it shines upon into light also” (Ephesians 5, Phillips translation). That means my light, my luminosity, my influence, is potent.

In my own journey toward Christ, I have to be reminded that my life is but a luminous addition in the whole light show. With this perspective, my own light show becomes very uninteresting, irritating, and pointless (pun intended) if not aligned with the entire light show. People watching the show will notice the random individual light that looks goofy. I suppose the question then becomes, in what light show will my life play a part? As we (ALC community) moves to the future and experiments with our Fall series, my prayer is that we will all be aligned with the same strategy, because if we’re not, it will be one poorly constructed expression; and our surrounding community will notice that. However, if the “light show” is one large moving experience, we may actually add others to the journey, and create a lot of excitement. It’s risky, but doesn’t that sound like a great journey?

top things i learned from willie nelson last night

ok, i am not going to complain, i am just gonna' rant a bit. you see, my buddy aaron and i go to a concert every year around our birthdays (well, we started last year but this will continue until one of us is dead). we call it BIG BOY BIRTHDAY BASH. no one else is invited, sorry.
anywho, last year, we went to see the police. wow, what a show! blew me away how these guys rocked. 2 1/2 straight hours of the police was incredible. this year, we decided to do another blast from the past and go to a concert we would normally never go see (that is like the theme of our BASH...going to concerts we haven't or would never go to...we actually thought about trying to go to a marlyn manson show but i am scared). we went to salisbury, aaron's birthplace, and attended the willie nelson show. i learned many things, some good, some aggravating. the show started at 745, and it was scheduled to start at 730...clue #1 this guy has no plans of being up past 10 when he walks on stage so close to the actual time. whatever. below are some of my learning/rants from the show last night.

#1: already mentioned. but when the "show" starts so close to the actual time (before 9pm is really odd for a good show), it is a bad sign. wille was on stage for one hour, twenty six minutes. he was done before he even got started.

#2: the average age in the "Center" was nowhere under 60. aaron and i were definitely a minority. one old woman fell during a song and some "ushers" spent quite a while picking her up, not sure if she had really broken the hip or not. i saw SIX motorized scooter chair thingys. and the smell of the "center" was coffee and moth balls, not the second hand stuff you would expect at a willie nelson show. so here's what i learned: talent/leaders/music attract their own age group unless they change their message and delivery.

#3: since i mentioned delivery, how about willie's band? well, there was willie, who sang and strummed an old guitar pretty poorly, the harmonica player who looked bored the entire time, the "drummer" who only played a boom chuck beat on a snare (there was no drum set, cymbals, kick, anything...just a snare), bass player, piano player, auxiliary percussion guy (played the triangle and tambourine a few times...no joke), and that was it. each song lasted about 2 minutes and was in the same key.

#4: apparently, willie has no idea how to sing or play his guitar in the right key or tempo. he played what he wanted while his "band" played recognizable melodies. when willie sang, he more or less spoke the words and did some strumming. there was no music to much of what he did last night at all.

#5: the "center" was set up for 5000 people...there were 2000 there tops. and me and aaron were waving the "we are under 30 flag the entire time" (even though aaron is 31, we wont draw any attention to this).

#6: apparently, when leaving a concert, elderly people are very intimidated by aggressive driving. i was proud to leave the "center" like a bat out of hell and give them all something to talk about for the next month or so 'round the cracker barrel.

#7: most of willie's songs were about death, loss, or good times with no plan. this connected with me on a few levels: one, his career has centered around these themes and it is very easy to see why culture embraced him. secondly, the way he plays and sings is his way. he doesn't give a rip what i think, you think, or anyone else. that's why he is willie nelson. lastly, he sings about what most of us would really like to happen: great times with no agenda or work. this type of dreaming is what music is made of for a blues/country artist. and it is really easy to see why the rebel/protest country blues picker is very popular with an aging generation. he was their voice many times when they weren't able, or just couldn't vocalize, their dark dreams.

#8: regardless of how poor the overall experience was (compared to other concerts i have been to, this would definitely rank lower than most of the southern gospels shows my parents used to drag me to), there is something to say about seeing a legend, and i am happy i was able to see the old man.

#9: willie is really in love with hymns. last night, we group sang: i saw the light, i'll fly away, uncloudy day, and a couple more.


so, all in all, horrible show, mediocre experience, but great moment when i saw they guy.

we're thinking about next year's show, and so far, here are our thoughts in no particular order:
-marilyn manson (but i think i am a bit too scared to do that, i would really be too uncomfortable, i think)
-neil diamond
-the killers
-roots
-eminem
-kenny rogers
-dolly parton (maybe together?)
-tom jones
-cher

the point here is to see someone we wouldn't normally go see, or someone we haven't seen before. any suggestions of an awesome show? comment and let me know. FYI, dont suggest coldplay, aerosmith, DMB, U2, the police, willie nelson, counting crows, black crowes, and quite a few more...we have seen them

take the risk, have some fun before the summer is gone,
n

Summer Lists

We are doing a new series in my church community called "Good Life Bad Times." The series is centered around the times we are living (bad) and how to make sense out of life and bring perspective to that. So, I thought I would share some on how I have developed over these bad times in finding a "good life." For me, this entire conversation boils down to the common ingredient: a verse in the New Testament that says in our lives we must think and act like Jesus (Paul wrote this in Philippians). So basically, my life becomes something bigger than me. In our culture, this is a very difficult thing to comprehend, because the idea of "ME" is such a focus (come on, you know it is). However, wouldn't it be great if we could find some redemption in our culture's message that pointed us in this direction toward Jesus and finding the right perspective for life?

I think so. In fact, what I have decided to do with this article is to give a short listing of books, movies, and music that have come out in the past 2-3 years that have provided some great messages and influence for my journey. Ok, on this list there are not some obvious things that many would think I should include; please remember, this is MY list. I encourage you to read it with a critiquing eye and only listen, read, or watch based on your own interest. Ok, here goes:

1. Book: Wide Awake by Erwin McManus. Ok, this book was released earlier this month and I am not close to finished, but here's the thing: this book is like a Purpose Driven Life for emerging culture. The synopsis for this book is intriguing: "Shuffling and half asleep, so many people coast through the day. From class to class, home to work, and stuck in traffic in between, many have yet to tap into a passionate reason for living. It's not that this life is bad, but it's not the life of their dreams. In Wide Awake, Erwin McManus opens readers' eyes to see the eight crucial attributes of those who achieve the life of their dreams. It is every person's responsibility to discover and develop the gifts given to them by God. McManus writes, 'The future is not waiting for us, it is waiting within us.' The world is desperate for the best each person can offer-if they would only relentlessly pursue and achieve it." This book makes my list because of it's timely release and subject. Plus, McManus is a great communicator, I have read quite of few of his works.

2. Movie: The Dark Knight. Yes, Batman. I won't even rave about the late Heath Ledger's interpretation of "The Joker" (which was one the best characters on the big screen I have ever seen). What I will say, without giving the plot away, is that this movie has many scenes where the characters have to choose a destiny based on conviction or comfort. The struggle of decision and outcome are very wide open throughout the film. It was a very well put together thriller, in my opinion.






3. Album: Give Yourself Away by the Robbie Seay Band. The musicianship here is top notch for a mainstream/worship band. The titles don't do the lyrics justice when it comes to looking at life issues. However, Love Wins and Shine Your Light On Us are two great ballads of seeking direction and dealing with the emotion of decision. The sound of these guys reminds me of Peter Gabriel meets The Fray.







4. Book: Flashbang: How I Got Over Myself by Mark Steele. Ok, this book is not only one of the funniest books I have ever read, but it is also one of the most interesting in the way it flows. Bringing fragmented stories together mostly in first person, Mark writes about a journey toward significance and discovery. It is a very easy read and I highly recommend it to anyone who hates books.

5. Album: Little Voice by Sara Bareilles. This singer/songwriter mostly writes about love and love lost, but I found this album to be a glimpse into a struggling decision making person both loving and hating the complexities of life. Great piano rock ballads and the popular song, Love Song, complete this big voice, great melody album.

the dark knight, trenton, NJ, and a great burger

first of all, play this video and just listen to this song while you read. newton faulkner is becoming one of my favs.



secondly, i have never really liked heath ledger. i found his performances in A Knights Tale and The Patriot reminiscent of teenage homage, much like Leo in Titanic. When Brokeback Mountain came out (no pun intended), I really had no more use for Heath. the movie itself, though controversial, was filmed well; i just didn't connect with the theme. i am not pulling any right winged punches, i just didn't like the movie. it didn't SPEAK to me. however, this clip from family guy does make me laugh:



Lords of Dogtown was my fav movie by him, until this weekend. THE JOKER is mr ledger. it will not be conceived again with the perfection that i saw on the screen. i want to be the joker now.
my sister said it best: "i didn't see heath ledge but maybe twice in the whole film. it was the joker the whole time." i agree. and i also think that is what makes actors so great: they take their personality and place it aside for someone else's. not to just make this a spiritual rant, but that is basically what i have been learning about myself and Christ: he wants me to put aside the nature of my self and put on his nature. it is a constant battle. i would make a horrible actor.

this past weekend, shauna treated me to a weekend of Yankee stadium and great food in manhattan. i came up with the wonderful idea to go to up the night before and stay in a hotel outside of the city. so i booked us in the marriott in new jersey. did i mention the city>? no, i didnt think so. yeah, we stayed in TRENTON.


So, you never want to purposefully stay in trenton. i have found THE most ugly city in the US. if you are from trenton, i know you wont disagree or be offended. in fact, you probably dont want anyone to know you ae from there, so let's not let the cat out of the bag by commenting and letting people know. trenton is scary. bad architecture, smelly streets, no good restaurants (that i could find), and horrible lighting. trenton takes the world makes i say.

on to a more pleasant experience: manhattan. went to the yankee game for the last time at the REAL yankee stadium. that was sooo fun. we sat in like 5 different seats b/c it is the bronx. we then went to the old homestead down off of 9th avenue. WOW...had the KOBE beef burger...WOW.



you must try it...

take the risk,
n

top six food places right now

i dont do a lot of fav posts, but i have had a mojor life change in the past six months. moving to MD from NC has been huge, and i have noticed that MD has its own feature of cuisine. i am a big food person, a connoisseur if you will. in concord, i had my fav places to eat, and i would usually go with a student or friend to lunch about every day. here in MD, i am developing relationships and, as what naturally happens when you move, i am discovering the places i want to frequent with team members and friends. however, with the economic crunch, my choices have another element of decision. not only do i have to find some new (relatively speaking, i know) places to frequent, now it is much more of a decision how much money i want to pay.

so, i developed my top six choices of food within 5 minutes of where i work. these choices are based on $$, taste, and ease of commute. so, here goes, in reverse order (meaning my fav will be at the bottom):


6. Quiznos. This is a choice based on current promotion. You can (as of today) get a 5 meat large sandwich for $5. Add a small drink to that and lunch is $7 (with tax). I LOVE this special promo sandwich. It is very tasty, and it big enough to where I dont need chips or cookie or anything else. Load it up with peppers at the pepper bar (another fav thing about quiznos) and i am good to go.



5. Panera. No, I don't have a testosterone problem. I have a weight and money problem.
Panera has much to give me for my money, and it is the healthiest option here. The "YOU PICK TWO" option starts at $6.29, and if you get a water with it, lunch is less than $7. The salads are fresh and clean and I enjoy the atmosphere A LOT (free WiFi). I hold several meetings a month here. Also, my friend Terry Jory (shout out) informed me of the kids menu that sports a large portioned grilled cheese. This meal comes with the grilled cheese and choice of side with a small drink for less than $5.


4. Qdoba. This is the most expensive option on the list. A good queso chicken burrito and a drink with chips costs you around $10. But you can just get the large burrito and a water for less than $8. Qdoba has tvs and a good atmosphere. The beans and meats are excellent quality and I enjoy the queso burrito the most. There are cheaper options. And on Monday nights (or tues nights?) it is Best Buy night. Take in any Best Buy receipt (current date) and get your burrito half off.


3. Taco Bell. With the arrival of the value menu and the Big Taste taco, i have again become a believer of the noisy afterburn cuisine of collegiate and high school champions. It is cheap, people, and it is classic taco bell. I can eat to my heart's content for less than $5. It may not be great quality, but it tastes good the first time. You will be burping it the whole day long, though. It gets the #3 spot because of price.





2. Chick Fil A. Sadly, I can;t get away from it. It is the ONLY place around here with good sweet tea. It would take the #1 spot for that alone for most southerners living in MD. You know what you're getting at CFA. There's no sirprises, and it is always their pleasure to serve you. Plus, sit in the back and avoid all the kids, get as many polynesian and BBQ sauces as you desire, and free refils on tea. This one is truly a no brainer. And the CFA here now has a spicy chicken sandwich.


1. (drumroll please, and no pic): Rocco's Pizza. Yes, a little local NY pizzeria joint in downtown Glen Burnie. BEST NY PIZZA I HAVE HAD OUTSIDE OF NY: PERIOD. Lunch special: 2 (huge) slices and a drink for $3.95. Small joint; only three booths and a TV on top of a drink machine. Best lunch value and taste around. And if you order a pie for the family, i suggest THE GODFATHER. It is pricy, but it is INCREDIBLE (pepperoni, sausage, onions, mushrooms, peppers, and extra cheese). It is the heaviest pizza i have had. Another item you can get relatively cheap for lunch: OLD BAY HOT WINGS. Oh yeah, you read that correctly. HOT WINGS WITH OLD BAY.

Honorable mention goes to the following places: Mikie's (good sweet tea and southern style menu), Five Guys Burgers and Fries (great burger but a little pricy), and Cluck U Chicken (huge plasmas and good chicken wraps).

Now, the best crab cake around here is at a place called G&M. I highly recommend
trying G&M out (although you will need $15 for a crab cake sandwich lunch; well worht it for the crab cake, though).

take the risk,
n

my bud brandon

recently, i did a phone interview with my long time friend brandon nash about his skate park and shop and how that effects God's kingdom. we used this in a weekend celebration to emphasize the point of God working our passions and gifts along with his purpose for our lives. enjoy.

from journaling to blogging...a constant quandry

i cant order my steps on this one. i write in a journal and in a blog. i have cut back on my journaling and started using my laptop more for that and keeping a log and posting something from it here and there. i can't get comfortable with posting everything on a blog. i guess i am not as transparent as i thought i was...

anyway, my journaling overall has declined as i have settled in here in baltimore. i am learning that i have relied on my teaching and communication to others too much in my own spiritual journey. it's funny: i have always counseled against that. so, i am making more of an effort to learn and grow on my own (more concentrated i guess is the right term) without the crutch of public speaking. baltimore is teaching me a lot about myself, and i am enjoying most of it.

shauna's in her final stretch at uncc. there is a back story to her job ending there that, many years from now, we will look back and laugh about. until then, it is frustrating. she just has to put up with some crazy mess while that situation is ending. it all came up suddenly. w/o getting into to much, the whole thing just proves God's faithfulness with our journey. she will be here FOR GOOD this weekend. i can't wait to be married again. single life sucks (for me, that is...i know you single folks are cursing me right now and that is ok, i get legal afternoon delights again starting saturday...you cant hurt me...did that comment cross a line?).

so i cant figure out the balance between journaling and blogging. and i dont want to waste my time figuring it out, either. for many, ok, for most, this isnt a dilemma. i just want to blog the meaningful stuff and keep the journaling stuff that is private to myself. i guess i am doing that. you know what? i am learning that i tend to think one way, and when it is challenged i have to kind of regroup and talk myself out of frustration and arrogant apathy towards the change. my god, i am old in my head, arent i? not only that i got a haircut today and i look just like my father! no more pics on here until my hair grows back out to some minimal length where i can spike it or something...no more buzzcuts for me.

i took a nap today at 8pm. how dumb was that? now i cant sleep. and i end up rambling and writing worthless stuff in a blog.
ohwell.

take the risk,
n

Famous Last Words...

yesterday i spent most of the day in a workshop with Tim Stevens at Granger Community Church. It was helpful, and was centered around his new book Pop Goes the Church. I got quite a bit out of it, but we were assigned to create a message series around the idea that Everyone Can Make a Difference (or something like that). We had five minutes to come up with the series idea and relate it to Pop Culture. Dan and I came up with a parenting concept that neither of us really liked. Here's the point: this morning at about 230 when I couldn't sleep (airline delays...long story), I got the lightbulb moment on how I would create this series. Here goes: a pastor friend of mine in orlando did a series at Status called Famous Last Words that was created around this idea. They took words of Jesus, Mother Teresa, Ghandi, and others and made the series around being a world difference maker like these people. SO my idea is to spring off of this but to make it more of a pop culture thing (like use Bono, Chris Martin, Angelina Jolie, Oprah, etc.) and tie them to ancient church figures that made a difference and married it to faith. The idea here would be to show different angles of world change/culture change would be cool...and bring ordinary people beside the idea of the Pop Culture celebrity (infuse some life stories)

As for titles i like the following:
Wannabes: How I wannabe versus how I really am
CopyCats: Great decisions that shape who we can be
Famous Last Words (to totally steal the idea now)
Everybody Wants to Change the World (take some Campolo ideas here)
Perspective )this idea takes the images from an investment firm i saw in london. for example, like this:









It is all in the perspective. One looks trashy to some and the other looks trendy to some. Here's the point I would try and make with the perspective parts on the story: Angelina Jolie changes lives in Africa by adopting babies (loose interpretation but you get my point) and Mary Churchgoer changes lives by feeding the needy in her community. It would be kind of a perspective swapping with the celebrity and finding the unknown celebrity changing the world right where we are at...

ok, the name sucks right now, but this idea is in development. i am open to suggestions.

later, take the risk,
nate

Risky Business (no, this is not about an 80's movie)

Risky Business (no, this is not about an 80’s movie)

Risk: exposure to the chance of injury or loss; a hazard or dangerous choice (so says dictionary.com).

I think I really learned what the word “risk” meant when I was home for the summer during my freshman year at college. Allow me to explain: my “guy” friends (we all know what that statement means, right?) and I went swimming every Sunday night. We called it “SNS” (Sunday night swim). This festive event began around 9:00 p.m., and it happened every Sunday night throughout the summer. We would begin in our church parking lot (where the most deviant plans are surely hatched), and “borrowed” a church van for our adventure (we had to have it, because we all had to ride together...you understand how to justify to get what you want, right?). The adventure led us to Lake Norman (outside of Charlotte, NC...by the way, close to where “home” is for me). Now, one wouldn’t see much danger and risk to swimming at night in a lake (except my mom), but you don’t know the full context of this risk. Not only was it night, and not only did we “borrow” a church van (don’t ask more details, please), but we went swimming at an abandoned dock at an abandoned house with no lighting.

As young college gentlemen will do, we developed a habit of “crashing” this abandoned dock and making it our own, complete with a gas grill. We didn’t realize the risk until we noticed, one blissful, warm summer night, the flashing blue lights by our van. So what did we do? Did we count our losses and pack up to apologize for trespassing? No way. We swam out into the lake further so we couldn’t be seen (college boys lack the mental capacity to think with brilliance at times). We didn’t stop to think that the church van actually had the name and address of the church on it, and that there was a call being made to the church.

I won’t go into the whole story, but I will say we were not arrested (which could have easily happened due to the following charges: grand theft auto, trespassing, littering, disorderly conduct, and being idiots swimming at an abandoned dock at night, just to name a few). The cops laughed at us and a smooth talking member of our group helped us justify the church van situation. In our case, the risk was definitely not worth the reward.

I wonder sometimes how God looks at his decisions. I understand that he is infallible and omni-everything, but I wonder if he looks at the risk of his love versus the decisions we (humanity) make. The life of Christ exists so my life can be worth living; so that I can have a future. How many days go by that I make decisions that jeopardize this promise? How often do I, like a genius young independent college freshman, pay more attention to my immediate satisfaction over the eternal reality? We are all, at times, like those boys at the abandoned dock, swimming further away.

“Create in me a clean heart, Oh God; and renew a right spirit within me.”
-David (the poet king)


on a more personal and solemn note, the below video is, in my opinion, the new risky business video that should replace the 80's original


ok, take the risk,
n

riding bikes randomness...last post for may

ok, first of all, i have what some folks would call a weight problem. it isn't so much of a problem i can't help, but really more of a problem i am too apathetic about to do anything productive to remedy it, besides golf (yes, with a cart).

until 4 hours ago.

i rode a bicycle. around my neighborhood. three times around the loop (that's three miles total).
i was so afraid that my largeness was going to burst the tires. i wish i were kidding. but i did it. the big guy took the bike and rode around the neighborhood like a big kid. and it was kind of fun. it doesn't look like there are any hills when you drive around the neighborhood in the car...but when you are pedaling...there is at least two stretches i hated. but you wouldn't notice the incline unless you were running or cycling. that's what i shall call it...cycling. on a mountain bike...from dick's sporting goods. pathetic.

i rode past kids that think they are cool. they were going home from swimming. they watched me as i rode by. i know they were making fun of me...but ya know what? don't care. they're kids. i could have them arrested (prolly not but i justify my apathetic disdain [yes, brackets inside a parenthesis because i just created a new phrase and there are too many rabbit trails in this posting anyway] with them in the fact that i think i am better b/c i am older).

oh my god i am my father.
love ya, dad.

i miss my wife. good news is she has a job here in Maryland and will begin july 1. until then life seems to suck a lot. i am not writing that for pity...i just simply need to vent. anyway, today was a laid back day. and now i cant seem to go to sleep. i have to get up pretty early, and i am not tired. bad combo. ambien anyone? wait, that sounds like an addict.

i am excited about how my first 90 days have gone here at ALC in maryland. i have learned a lot, most importantly that i have reverted to caring what people think of me. i used to not care so much and making decisions was easier. i miss that. i need that back. not that i want to tick people off, it was just a good thing when i could make a decision based on facts and logic and gut instinct rather than tip toe around feelings. yes, i think i need to find that balance. maybe one day i will have it all together.

another blog without pictures or video. who is a bad blogger? this guy. oh, and i watched way too much CNN today around that whole DNC meeting about the delegates. why am i fascinated about that? why have become such a nerd? I'll tell you why...wife out of town produces more dorkness in the brain for me. why is that? I'll tell you why...i cant relate to this:



looks like i had a movie anyway

oh well, jesus died on a cross i think i will live (now, i am my mom...geez)

take the risk,
n

great weekend and updated site

first of all...the church i am at now has an updated website. i have an awesome team that has put up with me through this process. the site is still just a temp site until i am ready to pull the trigger on a much larger scale, but my team did an awesome job. so stop reading, and go check it out www.abundantlifechurch.us

secondly, my fam came to visit this weekend. i wore them out...we did annapolis on friday night, DC on saturday, church and chill time on sunday and baltimore all day yesterday. however i think my favorite moment was definitely the ride into baltimore by boat. i have the coolest boss.

no pics yet...sorry

take the risk...
n

Pointing At Kids

I am not a kid person. My wife and other people assure me that will change when I become a father. I used to doubt them, and then I met Sam (that’s what we’re going to call him...I won’t use his real name because this kid will probably grow up and hate me for using his real name and beat me up. So, out of fear, I’ll just stick with Sam). Sam’s father and I are very close friends. We’ve known each other since the 1980’s. My wife and I sat down to dinner (at TGI Fridays...pointless reference) with Sam and his parents and, all of a sudden, Sam pointed at me. Now, please realize, Sam is two years old, and I am sort of scared of him. So, yeah, Sam points at me and his eyes get really large. I started feeling convicted, like this kid was getting ready to say something profound and it would make most of us (not me, of course) cry. I imagined him saying, “Nathan! Nathan! Why don’t kids like you? Why, it’s because they think you are a mean person with your big beard!” But Sam didn’t say that. Sam pointed, and then muttered the single word that changed my evening: “E.T.”

So, for those of you who haven't seen the movie, play these videos below. First play the second video. Then, after you have cried and watched, play the first and turn up your speakers so you can re-read the beginning to the music from the film. It will be a life changing event for you, I am sure.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, this two year old made a reference to the 1982 thriller, E.T. And he was waiting for my finger to stretch out and touch his, like the movie. Let me stop right now and tell you that if you haven’t seen this movie, then the moment being created here doesn’t carry the “Awww” factor for you. Back to the scene: so what did I do? I stretched out my finger and touched his and said “E.T.” right back at him. AND WE BONDED. We did this no fewer than 4600 times the rest of the evening.

And then I think about God: knowing who God is, understanding him, touching him, seeing him. I know I lack a lot of understanding about God. But that night over the dinner table at TGI Fridays, I learned about God through his creation, again. Imagine eating with God. Do it, right now. Imagine you and God are at TGI Fridays. What happens when you sit at a table with someone you don’t understand? What happens when you try and communicate with someone, who is so powerful and pure, that you really can’t connect? What happens when you really understand your vulnerability in that moment? Here’s what happens: you mutter something familiar. It can be a question, a word, or a song. And what happens in that moment, the other person makes the connection.

Now, I am not comparing myself to God. I am comparing myself to Sam. At God’s table in TGI Fridays, I feel like, most of the time, I am looking at him with big new eyes and pointing. And you know what? God makes the connection. I just have to be vulnerable, and look at Him.

“Attention, all! See the marvels of God! He plants flowers and trees all over the earth, Bans war from pole to pole, breaks all the weapons across his knee. ‘Step out of the traffic! Take a long, loving look at me, your High God, above politics, above everything.’"
-David, the Poet King

I WAS THERE

so i went to the orioles red sox game yesterday. jay payton hit a grand slam in the 7th off Okajima and the place went wild. it was such a great sports moment. i have seen grand slams before, but never in a MLB game. WOW.

so here's my play by play...when the ball was hit ( i was sitting up behind third base) to left field, i immediately jumped to my feet and started screaming and jumping. everyone KNEW it was gone. however, i soon felt my knees go to jelly and felt really drunk in my head. I ALMOST PASSED OUT...AT THE STADIUM. that would be a great headline: Payton's Grand Slam sends fat guy into shock.

it was fun, anyway. and in july, i will going to see Willie Nelson w/my buddy Aaron. oh, how when it is good it is good.

enjoy,

weekend with dad

me and my dad went to the wachovia golf tournament this weekend. i had so much fun. and i learned a lot of things about my dad. i realized it has been a long time since he and i spent some time together. i realized how much older we have both become since i graduated from college. the past three days have been wonderful...and the golf wasnt bad, either.
thanks, dad

no pictures...no video...just keeping this one simple

take the risk...
-n

it's almost midnight...this is a dangerous rambling

so i am here in my house alone. shauna is in NC and i will be leaving tomorrow for the queen city. i will be there this weekend to hang out with my dad...tradition thing he and i do now (it became tradition like two years ago...it would be cool if we had started this tradition when i was like 4...but that didn't happen b/c the Wachovia Tournament didn't exist then...so now, this is our tradition).



anywho, i have learned some things about myself with shauna going back and forth to NC for work and me being here alone. i like to call it being a fake bachelor. here's the short list of learned things:

1. as a fake bachelor, i tend to work more.
yes, it is true. i tend to stay more engrossed in my day to day work and obsess over ridiculously minute details. this has led me to realize that i am really OCD about a lot of things. then again, i am more lazy about other things when i am not a fake bachelor...are you following this? can i be more vague? anyway...i lose track of time when i am a fake bachelor.

2. as a fake bachelor, i spend more money.
i hope shauna isn't reading this. ok, it doesn't matter, we share a checking account and she knows this. i went to SAMS on monday afternoon...i bought a 30 pack of potato chips. i have no idea why i did that. i also bought the largest canister of peanuts known to mankind. i have never purchased peanuts before in my life. i am a loser.

3. as a fake bachelor, i procrastinate more than when shauna is usually around.
what i mean by this is simply that the dishes pile high in the sink, the trash piles high in the corner, the clothes pile high in the hamper, and i don't give a crap...and this is normal when shauna is here. with her gone, it is much worse. what happens then is that i spend a block of time fixing it all so it can pile up again.

4. as a fake bachelor, i read more.
this isn't so bad. there are many things i despise about being a fake bachelor. this isn't one of them.

5. as a fake bachelor, i hate to admit that tonight i watched american idol...and loved it when brooke was kicked off. although i am proud to say i still have never seen an entire episode of the bachelor on ABC. shauna loves that show but i think it is dumb.
what would have made me more happy is if the crowd would have thrown vegetables...rotted vegetables. and then, seacrest would have drop kicked her. and then, the guy that looks like an 80's stuffed animal (david archuohmygodheisthemostannoyinglettameslaphisunibrowface) would have been shot by the ghost of anna nicole. but if that happened, the economy may stabilize and gas would go under $2 a gallon again. and we all know oprah ain't gonna let that happen. wow...random.

6. as a fake bachelor, i either stay up much later than usual or go to bed very early.
for instance, ,tonight i will be going to bed around 1am. last night, asleep by 945. inconsistent and weird.

7. as a fake bachelor, i have ridiculous conversations with myself.
yes, i talk to myself regularly. i have learned to keep the voices inside, but when shauna is out of town, i find myself talking to me. last night, i actually debated with myself..out loud...and in walmart. Tyresha (walmart professional) gave me a look. i have seen this look before...and given it many times riding the light rail into Baltimore.

that is the short list. i am less disciplined and more weird without my wife. oh lord, please help us find her a job here very quickly. preferably, one that pays six figures before the decimal point and has flexible hours and free pro baseball and football box seats as a perk...b/c i know she wouldn't care for that but would give them to me to go and enjoy or sell for a profit.

seriously though, prayers are going up.

this move to Baltimore has had some challenges. but we are convinced it is a Kingdom thing. God is proving himself faithful. i cant wait to see how he works this one out.

take the risk...
-n

An Unwilling Self Seduction (or, more accurately, that one time I had stitches put in my face and dad couldn’t watch)

As a child, I had quite a few “accidents.” One of the most memorable is when I fell and sliced open my face in a Sunday School classroom. Long story, but it involves a small trampoline and a Sunday School classroom with the lights turned off (sorry, I lived at the local church through my childhood so my stories usually have something to do with a small church building and, for some reason, me ending up bleeding). I had to have stitches in my face. Today, I have a scar. It is below my left eye if you want to check it out. And, don’t tell anyone, but I am sort of proud that I have a cool scar.

It was like a scene out of “E.R.”, except it was 1987 (maybe...it was definitely the eighties). I was rushed into the bright green room and laid on a table; doctors and nurses were sewing up my face and my mom was holding my hand. My dad was staying out of the room because he couldn’t watch the open face surgery repair. I would say they were scared for my life because I needed stitches. Definitely life threatening when you need stitches (that is how I felt, anyway).

Have you ever noticed that when you were a kid life was more simple? I think it is because when you are a kid, life is all about you. As a kid, you are so self absorbed. You haven’t matured to the point where you know the value of caring for others, truly loving others, or (hold your breath) sacrificing for someone because you love them. My family modeled these things for me beautifully. So far, I have learned how to go from being really self absorbed to being less self absorbed.

Back to the emergency room drama. The doctor put stitches in my face, and I don’t remember if it hurt or not. After a couple of weeks, I would pull at them when no one was looking. Apparently, the fingernail of an eight year old is perfect for pulling out a stitch prematurely. But mom would catch me or dad would tell me to stop it. After all, if my gorgeous mug was going to survive this latest attack then I would need the stitches to stay in for the whole time.

My grandparents were impressed with the scar. I dont remember his exact words but I am sure my grandpa showed me his Korean War scar and I would show him my battle wound. At school, I would frequent the restroom to check my face scar. The second grade girls probably thought I was a hunk; after all, I had a scar.

In the Bible, the writer of John (book in the New Testament) used a definition of love that intimidates me. Basically,m he compares the love of Jesus to an unconditional, risky, wide-open love. A love so authentic and selfless that it doesn’t really make much logical sense in our world. I think the closest I have come to this type of love was when I was a kid, laying on a table, getting my face stitched up. I’ll let you fill in the blanks with your own story, but for me, I learn about love when I think of how close a family can be.

Now, my family (probably like your family) is weird. We are in no way a perfect model of selfless and unconditional love. After all, for that to happen I would have those traits myself, and believe me, I have a long way to go. But I have caught a glimpse from time to time.

When have you seen this type love expressed in family? Isn’t that what God desires for our faith community? As this article closes, let me leave you with some words Paul (a writer in the Bible) left for one of his faith communities. Be challenged by this in your family:

“Let's not allow ourselves to get fatigued doing good (loving each other). Right now, every time we get the chance, let us work for the benefit of all, starting with the people closest to us in the community of faith” (taken from Galatians 6).

it was only three weeks...

sorry. i am horrible when i get focused. i am so...not focused on other things...like this blog.

the past three weeks i have learned and began to cut a path here in baltimore. there is a big plate at my table to take on and the good news is i am a big guy and i wont have to tackle it all. i have an awesome team and i cant wait to discover the talent and leaders that will join our team over the summer. currently, i have three team spaces to fill ASAP that i am trying to juggle in the interim for our creative arts team: drama/sketch team lead, Creative Hosting team lead, and a Production Leader. wait, i have another one: audio technician team lead. yeah, that is about it. i have some awesome folks around me bringing support to this right now, but this is the state of the creative arts here...i think ministry is always in a position of need when it comes to passionate leadership.

so anyway, i got a golf membership for like $60/mo. and i am playing as much as i can (FUN). i also got a small ticket package to the orioles games. so i am finding ways to spend my free time.

miss my friends but you can all come hang out anytime. i do enjoy the relationships i am making and would like to merge both ends...

i am going to listen to some bab o reiley

later,
take the risk...
-n

the real motive

so i am meeting lots of new people and stuff. i love meeting new people. the only problem is, i cant really get to know someone without time...and they wont know me very well without that whole time factor either. anywho, some interesting people i met recently is a couple of employees at Pier One.

Back story:
Shauna and I purchased a ridiculously expensive hamper from the above mentioned trader (they trade crap and we give them money: hence, a trader). Long story short, we found some less expensive hampers (notice the plural, here) that were a little over half the cost of the Pier One hamper. So, basically, three hampers (that actually matched our furniture) were much less than the ONE hamper. Back to the back story, upon purchasing this original hamper, I worked a lot. This wasn't really brought to my attention until Shauna (my wife...) pointed out to me on the ride home that I had worked extremely hard to get this hamper. Let me explain: the hamper was FULL of pillows..I emptied it and arranged the pillows in another hamper. The hamper then had trash in the bottom of it (the expensive hamper had trash in it...hint, hint) so I cleaned it out. The hamper price tag was missing, so I went and found a price tag. Working hard to buy an overpriced hamper...and I was oblivious.

PIER ONE EMPLOYEES: They did absolutely nothing to assist me. Shauna brought this to my attention...AFTER we had purchased this ridiculously expensive hamper. SO...have you ever seen the "Two A-Holes" sketch from SNL? Go here to make that connection. So basically, the employees were like the wife in that sketch. Even when I took the hamper back, these employess were clueless, and it didn't register with me until I come home and realized how disconnected to reality they seemed to be.

HERE's THE POINT: Ok, this is deep, you ready? Those employees didn't care about helping us in buying or returning that hamper AT ALL. I know, you may need to have a seat with all this profound thinking going on, but stay with me. I am convinced...truly convinced...that these employees represent too many people in our culture. i know...getting deep. point being: self centered.

I think the defining trait of our culture is quite possibly: self love. Even in our good deeds we fill a selfish insecurity most of the time. I don't know about you, but I have sat in many religious groups and been guilted into serving others to make myself feel better. The love of Christ has nothing to do with some oddly hanging demonic gold star chart that feeds our insecurity and greed. I am convinced that unless there is a philosophy change, even with our giving, that the falsities of this mindset will give way into even further misunderstanding of our creator. The false teachers mentioned in the NT are led by these. I am convinced that those false teachers leading the charge are more ingrained in our religious culture than we realize.

all that from some Pier One employees, the 2 a-holes sketch from SNL, and some creepy NT verses...

take the risk,
n