My daughter is 2. Recently, she went from being mobile to being a monkey. Literally, if it is climbable, scalable, or within reach, she will scale to new heights. On her second birthday, she showed me how she was not going to stay in her crib anymore. I remember it vividly: I heard her struggling (we had already put her to bed), so I walked into her room. There she was, straddling the top of the crib rail, stuck. It was kind of funny, really. I looked at her and, with feigned wonderment, exclaimed: "Wow! Look at you! What are you gonna do now?" She was stuck and she knew it. If she fell back in the crib then she wouldn't be able to reach her goal (get out of the crib). If she fell out of the crib then she would get hurt and hit the floor hard (but would reach her goal). She squirmed; I let her squirm. I was attempting to teach her a lesson. She usually teaches me lessons, I've learned. Eventually, she fell back in her crib. I kissed her goodnight and left the room. It was about 2am (a few hours later) when I heard a distant but heavy thud. It was like someone had dropped a 20lb. sack of potatoes on the floor. "Oh no." I rushed in her room and, sure enough, she was on the floor. She wasn't stuck anymore. She was crying and she was frazzled. The next day, we switched to a toddler bed.
I love this story, not just for the memory, but for the application. I see myself in my daughter. I get stuck. Oftentimes it feels like a rut and spinning wheels or just discontent. Other times it's more like I'm on the edge of something; if I fall one way I fall back into something I don't want (like the safety of the crib). If I fall the other way, I could get hurt. Where the tension lies is in the moment I wait to make a decision. That's where I can get depressed, confused, complacent, intolerant, or just plain angry.
Those moments, the decision moments, seem to be like a state of limbo and sometimes I have waited way too long in limbo. If I get self focused and discouraged I tend to just stay there on the edge of the crib rail and I get miserable. Being in limbo makes me miserable. But, the stress of making the right decision is real. What if I make the wrong decision? What if I fall? What if I never get out of this blasted crib? Are you following my analogy, here? Being stuck sucks.
So, how do I get unstuck? Is it as simple as making a choice between one thing or another? Well, it can be. I've found that, most times, getting unstuck requires me to be reminded of my life mission. That usually is the catalyst to pushing me one way or another. This is emotional as much as it is practical. Sometimes, I'm stuck in a pattern of anger, sadness, feelings of worthlessness. The easy thing is to shove scripture in front of my face and just do my best to think positive. That really doesn't work for me. I need to be jolted in my state of limbo (stuck-ness). This always involves my mission in life: as a follower of Jesus, husband, dad, pastor (in that order). It's one thing to be reminded of my mission in life, and it is quite another to actively engage that mission. Disengaged (read: self indulgent, not moving) faith activates nothing.
Romans 12 says (as a follower of Jesus) to give my body to God as a living sacrifice and to stop following (or ignore) the patterns of other stuff (the world's pattern of life). This is a big edge. This is an edge of looking outside of me. This is a statement that is more than just positive, happy thoughts. Stuck= me focused on me.
So, where are you stuck? Faith? Friendships? Money? Self worth? Whatever it is, I promise you that if you can discover your God mission in the midst of all that stickiness, then you can gather the courage to get unstuck. It's often difficult, and this is no formula. This is transformation. Daily.
